Nifty Noodles/ Long Beach

Long Beach, Ca. 2/28/03 Celebrate Recovery...

Tonight's set included a medley of four new songs I've been writing including One I just started yesterday called "until I lied to myself" it was included with "no words", "Jesus Loves me anyway", "only You".

This CR literally meets in a basement! it's like the ultimate anonymity meeting. Sound was poor but hey it's the catacombs! they had a crack worship band and singers...(No they weren't on crack.. It's a term for "on the ball") A cut above some of the big churches I've been around.

I was more serious than usual and shared more of my personal testimony...(updated) than I can ever recall... Not because they were receptive really but because I want to hear the truth come out of my mouth once and a while... Maybe I needed a meeting myself.

I have a friend who went down with me to help me out... He's celebrating one year clean from Heroin. We were in his old stopping grounds..."I used to sleep in that park" he said "and under that bridge"... "I used to get high behind that liquor store" he added.

I'm amazed at the difference in this mans life and the grace God has afforded him... You'd never in a million years think by looking at him that he was once homeless and a hopeless addict... O.K. He does look like someone you might meet in prison... Except for the smile.

God taps me on the shoulder and says "this is what I love to do!...redeem the lost!"

K I'm done.... Bryan d

Nifty Noodles/ Where am I

2/23/03 Sunday Riverside, Ca

When I'm home on a weekend, which used to be rare, These days I'm helping out at the local Celebrate Recovery... Actually now there are 4 in Riverside alone.

It is a growing work... For a growing need. I led my first "praise and worship" segment this week...with live band and singers. A simple 20 minutes. We started with "I walk by faith" then I did a new song I wrote a few weeks ago called "only you" and then into "I Love you so much". I did "clap your hands" from my last record for the offering.

I have not been willing in my lifetime to contribute in this way at a church service. Even now my attitude isn't always the best. But I have to follow God through the doors that are open and this was an obvious need.

I'm alarmed at the way in which my life is changing and the direction God is leading. My "Road To Redemption" radio show went on the air in Des Moines today for the first time anywhere. Haven't heard how it was received. Feel like I'm in the waiting room anticipating my newborn.

By the way I finished my home improvements in the back yard! thank God... I've never been so tired. Ten days to rebuild a failed system of drains and this week I get to test 'em out! Rain is coming to Southern Cal again this week... I've never been more excited.

Let it rain I say. I have the drainage system to beat all systems, with an overflow pumping station that can pump the water out of my jacuzzi in an hour! Of course yesterday we had a 5.3 earthquake and I had little defense to show for that. Doesn't it just figure. Prepare as I may, there's always something else.

I'll be back to playing the piano soon as the cramps in my hands subside from the digging and the jack hammering of some of my brick work... I can't feel my fingers right now... Why did I do this work myself you might wonder... Cause I didn't want to WAIT.....wait for a month to get three estimates and have a contractor piddle around for another three weeks to get this done.

I figure I saved $3000. And won't need that anger management class that I would have needed to deal with the aftermath of your average contracting service in these parts.

Still there is the home owners insurance guy who called to tell me he couldn't find my house on his map!!! I think he believed that I wasn't really here. Funny, the "POLICE HELICOPTER PILOT" had no trouble finding me... Maybe you could call him!!!

Thanks for letting me share....:) bryand

Nifty Noodles/ Air One

2/19/03 On Monday I became a rare individual I think... I had the honor of being pulled over by a police helicopter! He wrote me a ticket for illegal dumping. "I was, in my defense, trying to put back the dirt that washed into my drains and flooded my house I Told the pilot of "Air One" ( who by the way knew who I was). It's not like I'm dumping refrigerators out here..." This will be perfectly good dirt once it dries out". " Why did you just stand out there and continue to unload the dirt?" was my wife's question. "Because I didn't think I'd get busted for putting dirt back in the ruts the rain washed out in the first place"... And besides... I'm gonna out run a helicopter? " we coulda made the t.v. News if you would have run" said one of my helpers.

The pilot made us load up the dirt we dumped and it cost me $21. To leave it at the official dump site. (plus a hefty fine the ticket will cost me). It's taken six days to get my yard put back together with a new drainage system. But now even Tim the Tool man Taylor would be proud.

Still waiting on new carpet for the bedroom and then there's furniture to move. I've discovered some new "defects of character", I don't handle stress very well. This whole experience has been the biggest distraction of my adult life I think. A week long nightmare! mentally and physically exhausting. Couple thousand dollars worth of damage... Not even enough to make the news really... But still an irritating distraction and a diversion of focus.

I did manage to drive down to a mall in Santa Ana yesterday to play live on KKLA, Duffy, the radio host was having a little shindig. I've never been so thankful for my other life in my life... But then back to my own "shindig" (shin deep in mud & digging). I had to get this done quickly and I wasn't gonna let it sit while we looked for estimates and scheduling... I guarantee it would have taken anybody else three weeks!

Thanks for lettin me be cranky bryand

Nifty Noodles/ Entanglements

2/15/03 At home....
I'm learning a lesson in long term effects of wrong choices... I decided to plant palm trees around my Jacuzzi and close to the back of my house... Seemed like a cool idea and it looked good when I was finished planting! Five years later the roots of the trees are tearing up my patio and worse. after this last "outpouring" of God in the form of rain" (like nothing we've had here in ten years) I came home to a flooded master bedroom.

I couldn't find the source of the intrusion my carpet was just soaked with an inch or so of water. Upon inspection I found all the drains behind the house to be completely clogged with tree roots packed so tightly in the drain pipes they were unsalvageable. With growth the trees had lifted the ground level as much as five inches.

At one corner of the house covered by a thin layer of earth were palm tree roots, the tiniest filaments of which allowed water to seep into my house without leaving an obvious trace. I'm looking at a thousand dollars worth of damage and repair at least.... I've been digging up all the drains ( destroying perfectly good sprinkler lines as well) in the attempt to "amend" this mistake I made in judgment years ago...

Myself and four friends (hired) dug non stop for a long day and a half just to remove the roots and dig up my yard. To come, there is still several days of replacement... Carpet and pad, drains and fixtures and putting furniture back in place. Hauling away tons of mostly roots with some dirt attached. There was a new plan designed for "responsible drainage" including six new drain locations and new seem-less gutters to divert run off. All this for an event that happens in California once every few years!

Maintenance and preparation always seem like such a waste of time. The whole time I'm chopping out the roots with and axe I kept thinking about how this applies in my spiritual life. "entanglements" was the key word. Just little decisions over the years that don't have immediate consequences and decisions even that make you look good in the short run.

And then there is the problem of "maintenance". NEVER FUN, always boring and "why do I have to do this routine?.. It hasn't rained in years" You getting any pictures here? I'm not gonna spell it out for ya.

I still had time to play a private Valentines Banquet in the local area... I felt a little like Krusty the clown in this setting but hey I was happy to still be able to move my fingers and stand up straight after the last 48 hours in the mud.

I shall not regret my past nor wish to shut the door on it... Let's call it a lesson learned! and I have this little analogy to pass around as well.

I'm bryand thanks for lettin me share.

Nifty Noodles/ Show Time

Wednesday Feb 12/ 03

Feb 16th The Road To Redemption will be aired for the first time on Radio... In Des Moines, Ia... The center of the country. Maybe we can work our way to both coasts from there. Spent the day doing the 9th show for RTR and had to change the rest of the shows a little because I kept saying... " tonight's show". I never expected to get any time slot short of late night... So we changed 'em all to say "this week's show". Of course we're still assuming that nobody will ever play it more than once a week.

We record each show on computer format so you can cut and paste anyway and drop in whatever stuff I forgot... We did some 30 second promos for the station too and recorded an interview request from the United Kingdom... A station over there sent me the questions with my answers from interviews over my career lifetime... I was supposed to just read my own convictions in print and add the necessary voice passion.

This was an insurmountable task with some questions as my opinions have changed. My insights were shortsighted in some cases too... Imagine that! I found myself arguing with a younger version of myself here! How could I have been so confused? And then there were the dead on answers from twenty years ago about the correct things to do in the name of God... And I wondered "wow how come I didn't follow my own advice?"...

Clearly, I've lost it more than once on the hairpin curves of the mountains of circumstance I've traveled through in my lifetime. I needed some therapy after this show... I'd like to think I've changed a lot over the years but I'm not so sure...maybe it's just the rocking of the boat that puts me in a different position now and then. Looking back, the row I've hoed is not very straight.

I left the studio in a strange gloom... But then it was pouring rain in L.A., also a rare and strange thing...

Pray with me that this show stays in that passionate place I've found for it regardless of it's success or failure. I still remember back in September of last year being scheduled to go on the air locally and then they changed there mind a week out. After much promotion.

God's timing is his own and his will be done not mine... Then on going crack I made today was "Dear Bryan, GET OVER YOURSELF!"

Thanks for lettin me share!!! bryand

Nifty Noodles/ Radio Rehab going on the air!
2/10/03
Monday....Riverside, Ca

Good news! my friends and I have been praying about getting "The Road To Redemption" Radio show on the actual radio. Well we've heard from KPFZ in Des Moines, Iowa that they will begin playing it for response on Sunday mornings at 8:30. Until they get a "paying" interest in the time slot. This is a better time slot than I could have hoped for frankly... And should it go well it will help us push the show to other stations!

I have Quietly been producing this show since September of last year with the ample help of my sound tech, David Rowe at his studio in Eagle Rock, Ca. The shows have been taking three weeks on the average to write and pick songs and then produce the prerecording.

I imagine I might have to pick up the pace! finding songs that speak to the particular subject of each show is the longest part for me cause they have to be tunes that I LIKE! that narrows the field substantially. And I have to listen to a lot of music to find the right stuff.

I'm working on a show this week based on the 12th step of recovery called "on a mission from God" this week. The show is more edgy rock than last weeks R&B ho down. Featuring mostly my own songs cause I knew the lyrics there more than outside material.... And so, the show will feature "Sometimes in the Dark", "This Love is What I Get", "Holiday in Heaven"... Also "could be Talkin" / Ashley Cleveland & "Hey Jayne"/ Randy Stonehell.

I'm "Quite thrilled" to see some interest in my new passion...

Keep praying for a brighter future... And lets go boldly where no man has gone before... Bryand

Nifty Noodles/ the real issue
Friday 2/7/03
Lake Forrest, Ca / Friday Celebrate Recovery Saddleback Church

In my haste and distraction I left the key element to any of my concerts at home... The econo band! I was looking forward to this gig. It is one of my favorite places because I've gotten to know so many in recovery here. Of course I still wanted to be impressive in my production. With the band now an hour and a half away round trip... It's just me and the piano and a couple of tracks I had in my truck. (Songs from ten years ago...) I guess now I'll have to be transparent and trust God for real... I can't believe how easy it is to talk about and how hard it is to actually do!.

But I had planned to sing two new songs I've written this month. "No Words" And "Only You". And so I did... And I was an attention deficit nightmare... I could not play either song without horrific compromise to perfection...

I limped through a piece of "Maybe I'm Amazed". without a track or band this was a mess and so too was the song I made up on the fly to lighten the moment.

The problem is that I became so SELF conscious and anxious to impress that I forgot one thing... In This crowd of over nine hundred are the broken beyond imagination, the crushed and the outcasts, failures at management of their own lives... They've got bigger problems to face and all they're looking for is a little love and encouragement.

I walked outside after my songs kicking myself so hard I almost didn't notice the guy outside in tears because his wife just filed divorce papers. He was not worried about my flawless presentation of the facts!!!!

When will I be able to see what God sees in peoples lives?... I might then be able to realize why God allows things to come apart from our perspective so that he might get to the real issues. All my "defects of Character" were showing clearly... My controlling tendency and perfectionist bent.. And of course the desire to hide behind my one talent so as to look bigger and better than I am.

The thing about recovery that is so enticing to me is that I might actually recover!

O.K. God's will not mine....and help my attitude about that.... Bryan d

Nifty Noodles/ Radio Eight
Wednesday 2/2/03
Sunday/ Sleepin'

Sat at home and did nothing!

I watched the last round of the Bob Hope Chrysler Classic. Fell asleep in one of those big fat lazy boy chairs in front of my Big fat Screen t.v. which, up until the super bowl, I didn't know how to operate.

I'm home and It's slow going... Not used to it. I did attend the local Celebrate Recovery meeting on Friday. Joined the praise and worship team in a couple of songs I'd never heard before. Played my newest tune, a praise and worship number, called "only You".

I've learned how to play a couple of other tunes too...including "I love You so much" and "I will sing of your love forever"...the local program can use my input. It's way different than being center stage.

Humbling, I guess is the word I'm looking for.

I also attend a Sunday morning recovery meeting that meets at a local recovery home here in town when I'm home. I like the honesty there better than church frankly!

I'm sitting at my piano a lot these days. Maybe the most ever since before my career started. Back when my apartment was a garage and I had three items in it... A bed, a crock pot, and an old upright piano.

I feel like I've come full circle except that I'm old and tired now...which might explain the whole "sleeping" in the lazy boy experience this week end. The scary thing is, I could get used to this... Somebody stop me.

Gave a full collection of my Radio Rehab shows to "My Family Incorporated" the local rehab facility just two miles down the road from me. This is the full extent of my ministry to others this week end.

My immediate family has discovered that what I like on t.v. Is not their cup of tea either. They're not used to me being home, fighting for the remote!

I'm restless when there is not an aganda. I pace every 30 minutes at home. Wander the property. At night it's clear and the stars are amazing over the desert that is Riverside. Orion's belt is right out my front door and straight up. "I watch the moon as it clears the wall". I'm not missing God's handiwork these days.

Let's just say I enjoyed the moments... I'm bryand...Thanks for lettin me share.

Copyright © 2000, 2003 All Rights Reserved, BryanD.com & Bryan Duncan